Wipe Your Eyes
by BeautyIsHerName
Summary: Inspired by Maroon 5...Something isn't right and I don't want to fight...Jade's struggles cause her to cut. She has lost faith in herself and the people around her. Can someone show her how important she is? Will she be able to see it for herself? Jandre, Bori, Cabbie*Disclaimer*
1. Our Deal

Our Deal

Best Coast

Chapter 1

…..

_Two bodies moving together. Heated touches. Passionate kisses. Tongues moving together. Tasting one another. Hands roaming. Becoming familiar with each other's bodies. Moving together as one. Her moans addicting. Trying to serve her every need. Trying to fulfill his purpose as hers. _

_Harder. Faster. Slower. Deeper. Her wish was his command._

_Her film of sweat forming. He was taking her to new highs. A place she had never been before. His fingers in her hair. Looking in her eyes. Her gorgeous grey eyes. Her hands on his back. His hand on her thigh. Both reaching their peaks at the same time…_

And suddenly….Andre's eye opened. Sitting up. Wiping the sweat off of his forehead. Putting his face in his hands. The dream again. He and Jade. It felt so real. And it was real for that one moment. She let him touch her in the most intimate way possible. Touching his lips. It was as if he felt her lips still there. And he tasted her on his tongue.

But he couldn't go there with her. Even if her and Beck were no more. What friend would he be if he did that? It's not as if she would want him.

This obsession with her since that song. That damn song. Her beautiful voice. Her beautiful clear voice that still rang in his ears.

Tori was right. Jade was everything he shouldn't be attracted too. But he still fell for her. Longed for her. Seeing her anger and short temper as something deeper. A defense mechanism. She had been hurt before. Somehow. And he could see it.

But could Beck? Back and forth. On and off. Their relationship was. And it only added to Jade's roughness. She needed stability….

But he knew deep down he would never have the opportunity to give her that.

…

Jade huddled herself in the corner of her bedroom. The darkness cascaded and covered her. But no matter how hard she closed her eyes. Her reality never changed. And no one would know of this reality, except for her. She would put on this façade for those around her to see. They would not probe. And that was what she wanted. At least what she told herself.

Her sharp tongue kept them far away from her. Her gothic nature fascinated and scared them at the same time.

Kind hearted Vega. The girl who she knew wanted nothing more than just to make peace.

Bubbly Cat whose ditzy, goofy ways made her laugh though she dare not show it.

Nerdy Robbie whose shyness and awkwardness was what made him Robbie…and then there was…..

Charismatic Beck. The boy she had put so much energy into. The boy she had used to try to drown out her problems. The boy who she knew had more chemistry with Tori than her. She was like her mother. But unlike her mother, she used boys rather than alcohol.

That was why she was here holding herself. Rocking back and forth. The nightmares. The flashbacks came all at once. And no matter how much she hid behind her gothic ways. It was never enough. Wiping her eyes, she remembered…it was so long ago…..but at night time….the moment replayed over and over again.

"_Mommy? Where are you?" a ten year old Jade walked through her small home searching for the woman who was supposed to protect her from everything that wanted to harm her._

_Crack_

_Biting her lip, she ran to the bathroom. Opening the door slowly. Seeing her mother on the ground on the ground. Licking perfume off the ceramic floor. The broken perfume bottle on the ground. Shattered into a million pieces._

"_Mommy….." She said silently crying. Walking to the kitchen, grabbing the dust pan and broom. Seeing the beer bottles in the trash can. They were out once again. And her mother went through extreme measures to fill her void. At least it is not the rubbing alcohol again._

_Returning, she cried seeing her mother lick the liquid. Not caring how it was hurting herself or her daughter._

"_Stop it….." Jade yelled as she walked to the woman with matching grey eyes._

"_Go away Jade." Her mother's voice cracked. The woman held herself trying to get as much as she could._

"_No I won't." Jade wrapped her arms around the woman's neck hoping that she would hold her back._

"_Jade go away!" He mother yelled pushing the little girl away from her. On the hard floor. As pieces of glass cut her arms…._

She still felt them on her arms. Now healed but she wasn't. she never would be. And no one seemed to care. And that was what she deserved. Because of her actions toward the people around her…..

Especially Andre. Andre Harris. The boy who was light-hearted. And fun…and always found the good in everything. And he had the ability to bring it out of everyone around him. She hated how she couldn't find one thing about him to hate. And she hated how found herself wanting to be close to him anyway possible.

Helping Andre with his song.

Hammertime.

The sushi restaurant during Robbie's Hambone competition.

But her life was a tangled web of complication that couldn't be fixed. And the more she tried to not be like her mother. The woman always came out her in different ways. Her short temper. Her witty remarks. And that was why she tried to be different.

The dark clothes. Hair extensions. Odd colored highlights. But it was no escape. The only escape she had was her music….and then there was Beck….who was not hers anymore. And then thinking…..she realized…he was never really hers…..

Picking herself off of the ground, she walked to her grandmother's room. Kissing the old woman on the forehead as she slept. Finding herself watching the wrinkled cute woman sleep. At least there was someone else in her life who shared her same pain. And she would always love her for taking her away her mother. At least now, she didn't have to worry about hearing her mother with random men at night…..or worrying where her mother was when she wasn't in her house.

Pulling the cover over her granny, she noticed a picture on her nightstand. She and her mother. The two people her grandmother loved in the entire world. And as many times as they tried to give her mother interventions or send her to rehab….it wasn't enough….

Jade picked up the picture on the nightstand. Brushing a piece of her hair behind her ear. The pit of her stomach weighted her down…and her anger boiled. Why did she love her mother after everything she did to them. Placing the picture down gently. She left the house.

She didn't know where she was walking to. She wasn't paying attention to her surroundings. All she wanted was to not feel so weak. They thought she was stronger than what she really was. But she wasn't. Not at all. And her feet wouldn't let her stop. The cool breeze blowing. She should have gotten a jacket. How could she forget?

…..

Being here always made things better. Took his mind off of all the complications. Grazing his fingers over the piano keys, he let the sound soft music be his guide.

_Now that she's back in the atmosphere _

_With drops of Jupiter in her hair_

_She acts like summer and walks like rain _

_Reminds me that there's time a to change_

And Jade was the only thing that ran through his mind. Envisioning her with him. smiling. A true smile. Being where she needed to be. In his arms.

As she opened the doors. To her school. The melodic tones soothed her. This voice. She recognized. Andre's. it always took her to another place. Her feet guiding her to the music room. Opening the door, she saw him there. Playing. In his element. Admiring him like she had that night.

_Tell me did you sail across the sun _

_Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded _

_And that heaven is overrated_

Andre felt a presence behind him. abruptly stopping, he turned around seeing Jade stand in the door frame. Her dark hair flowing. Her hands clutching her arms. Both were speechless.

"That was really beautiful Andre." She walked to him as his eyes didn't drop hers. Like he was looking for an explanation as to why she was there at this time in the morning.

"Thanks." He said softly noticing she was paler than usual. And the tear stains on her face that he was too smart to point out. And her constant shivering. It must have been unsettling for her to not wear a jacket outside.

"Here." He said taking off his hoodie over his head. Jade turned her head noticing how this somewhat exposed his stomach. Since when was she shy around boys?

"No thanks." She said as she sat down beside him. "are you going to finish it?" she asked trying to hate him with every fiber in her body.

"Finish what?" he was captivated by her beauty.

"Drops of Jupiter….duh…." She held herself tighter as he continued to play. His voice relaxing her.

_Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star _

_One without a permanent scar _

_And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there_

Jade watched him. intently. Wishing she could be the girl in the song he was singing to. But she would just get disposed of. Like Beck did her. Like her mother did her. Like her father did her. And she didn't belong anywhere. She was a misfit.

As Andre stopped playing. He noticed how she kept rubbing her arms. This wasn't the Jade he was used to seeing.

"Jade…." He unconsciously gently tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. He always wondered why she never had a problem with him touching her.

"You know I don't like being touched." She forcefully said, trying to convince herself of this… but Andre's touch made her forget that.

"you're cold." He ignored her words as he found himself trying to rub her arms. Jade only hit his hands to keep him away. "You're so stubborn. Would it have been so hard to except my hoodie."

"I'm fine." She said with venom but it didn't scare him away. If anything, it made him want to take care of her even more.

"You're still cold." He said plainly rubbing her arms as she reluctantly let him. Goosebumps on her arm forming. "What's wrong? What's got you so wonky?" He tried to tease her seeing a smirk.

"Nothing…." She lied as he let it go. Putting his hoodie over her head. This time she didn't refuse as she put her arms through pulling it down. "What brings you here?" she asked.

"I couldn't sleep." He said as flashbacks of him and her crossed his mind. He was so close to her. And she let him touch her.

"me either…." she said silently seeing the emotion on his face. In his deep brown eyes. Asking a silent question with them. The dark girl found herself leaning in waiting to taste his lips. It was just a peck. A soft peck. A peck that made her want more from him. The unsure kiss. Eyes meeting again. He leaned in once more. His finger holding her chin in place.

She didn't know how he did it. She didn't know how he always made her vulnerable. Beck never did this to her. But here she was. Kissing his best friend. But in that moment. Beck didn't matter. Or her mother. But then she realized that he would too leave her like they did.

Andre lost himself in this kiss. Somehow he found his hands grab her waist as her hands cupped his face. Finally, he was able to have a little piece of her. Even if it was for this only moment.

"Andre." She parted away from him. her hand on his chest. Trying to gasp for air. "That can't happen again." She said as he nodded.

"I know it can't." He said still holding her looking in her eyes.

It was as if what he just said was never spoken. She closed her eyes feeling his hands rub against her back. It was like he knew how to calm her. Everything about him relaxed her.

"I….I thought we said it could never happen again." She barely whispered seeing passion in his eyes.

"I did….but it's hard to let you go." He said having to pry his hands from around her. Seeing her in his hoodie was the sexiest thing he had ever seen.

"Andre…you have to….I'm going to pull you down too." She felt lost when his hands disappeared from her waist. Folding her lips together, she walked away from him. touching her lips. She did him the biggest favor. Keeping him away from her. But she knew deep down it was going to be impossible.


	2. Battle Scars

Battle Scars

Lupe Fiasco

Chapter 2

…..

Something was off. Very off. Had to be. That would explain why Andre couldn't open his locker. Looking at him, he angrily turned the dial on his combination. Walking up to him, Tori leaned against the locker beside him. So unsettled, he didn't notice her.

"Andre spill." The beautiful Hispanic, folding her arms, smiled as he shook his head irritated. "Woah. This is really major isn't it?" Her face dropped it's silly smile. She knew her best friend who could make the most sinister laugh.

"Nothing." He shrugged, dropping his books in his locker, seeing Jade walk in the hallway. "Definitely nothing." He walked off before Jade got towards them.

"Woah…..woah. O my gosh….what happened?" Tori asked aloud seeing the look her friend gave the black mistress who had the same saddened look on her face. Jade never smiled, hardly. But she never frowned either. She wore an icy mask to cover how she truly felt. Everyone knew this.

"What's with you Vega?" Jade asked seeing her associate's face of curiosity and shock and question.

"ummm….nothing…..Andre wait up….." she said running behind Andre as Jade watched the girl run. Seeing Cat, Robbie, and Beck together. No care in the world. Oblivious to her. And she wanted that. She didn't want to be noticed by even herself.

Opening her locker, a pair of scissors fell out. Looking at the blade, she put it in her bag as she headed to class.

…

He didn't need to hear this from Tori. Seeing her and not being able to touch her again hurt him more than words could describe. Her pale skin accenting her hair with green streaks. But she walked the halls as if she was unaffected by him. But he should have known. Especially when your ex was Beck. The nonchalant ladies' man who knew he was attractive.

"You can't ignore me Andre." Tori cornered him in the hallway.

"Tori…look…I don't want to talk about it." He let out a deep breath grabbing his backpack straps.

"What happened between you and Jade? Even she is off more than usual….and don't try to lie because you are terrible at it." Tori observed the situation not paying attention to Cat walking up to them.

"You wanna know what's off?" The bubbly red head said as the black boy just laughed at her naivity.

"What?" Tori asked in frustration.

"My shoes." She said laughing showing them her pink polka dot socks.

"I'll bite….why are your shoes off?" Tori asked knowing the response would be a crazy one.

"How else would I be able to glide on the floor." She laughed running as other students got out of her way. Andre tried to walk off as Tori pulled his arm.

"Not so fast." She said.

"Fine…." He couldn't hold it in anymore. "Me and Jade kissed the other night."

"O my God. That's wonderful. You always liked her." His best friend exclaimed seeing Beck walk up to them.

"What's wonderful?" The charismatic tan boy asked putting his arm her. Andre saw why Jade felt insecure with boy. He was known to flirt with any beautiful girl who called themself his friend.

"Nothing man. Catch you later." He walked off as Tori wished she knew what she could do for her friend.

….

He was angry at her. But she would rather him be angry at her now than later on. She saw his dreds from afar. And she wished she could tell him what he did to her. She wished she could tell him everything. Explain to him why she acted the way she did.

Why she couldn't be around him. If only he knew how hurt she was because of him.

Sitting on the bathroom stall. All she wanted was to be…..normal. a normal teenager with normal problems. Not worrying about her mother every second. Or how scared she was to let people close to her. Or how to stay away from the one person who she knew was truly genuine.

On her arms, the scars from that day. Her mother pushed her away. That was why she stayed covered. She didn't want to answer any questions.

She would have to speak about the lust for alcohol in her mother's eyes. Or how she would have to lock the door at night to keep her mother's random boyfriends from sneaking into her room.

Once was enough….and she wouldn't let it happen again. She wouldn't wish that on anyone. She still felt that man touch her. And when she told her mother. The woman only laughed. At least her grandmother cared enough to take her away. To another state. And helping her accomplish her dreams.

She was being over dramatic. She said over and over again to herself. This was something Vega did. Not her.

And Vega always outshined her. With Beck. With Andre. With everything. Everything she touched turned into gold. Why couldn't she be like that?

Taking out the scisiors from her bag. She began to open them. Staring at the blade. The metallic metal that was sharp to the touch. Calling her. Begging her to use them.

She had done this many times. When that man made her touch him. the only pain she could control. And right now. She needed to be able to control something. She didn't want to but this craving made her.

The craving. The untamable beast that tangled itself around her heart. And made her relive every agonizing moment of her life. The craving that made her relive Andre's soft lips against hers. He holding her so gently.

Taking the blade, she held it over her arm. Biting her lip, as it pierced her skin. The blood cascading the scissors as she soon felt nothing but relief. Relief that the pain escaped some way. Grabbing some toilet tissue. She added pressure to the wound.

As blood began to clot, she placed her black sleeve down. Putting the scissors in her bag. Walking out the stall, Vega walked inside.

"Jade. Where have you been? I tried texting you a gadrillion times. We are on our way to set some sushi." The beautiful girl who people gravitated too said.

"Last time I checked you weren't my mother." The black mistress said as Tori rolled her eyes.

"I'm not your mother. I am trying to be your friend. Include you. It's like you don't want to be around us."

"Bingo." Jade washed her hands. Looking at herself in the mirror. Her eyebrow pierce. Her red lipstick. She was just too damn pale.

"Jade." Tori tried to plead with.

"no I don't want to go eat sushi. Why? So I can see you and Beck flirt. So I can be around Rob's dorkiness. Cat's ditziness. Andre's…." She couldn't say the right words as she began to be breathe slowly. Resting her hands on the bathroom sink.

Tori caught on to the girl's last words. How she stopped at Andre's name. She did…..wait. The red liquid dripping on the counter. From her arm. Her heart began to clench.

"Jade." Tori quickly grabbed at paper towels putting them on her friend's wound.

"I hit my wrist." Jade said not looking at the girl.

"On what?" The other expected an answer from her.

"Why can't you just mind your own business. And leave me alone." She walked out pressing the towel on her wound still.

…..

Andre knew she wouldn't here. At least with him here. And he found himself not wanting to be here. But he had to realize that life moved on. and not every story would have a happy ending. He wanted a moment and he got it. But it didn't satisfy him.

"Hey Andre….what do you call a stick that can do kung-fu?" Cat asked as he shrugged.

"Chopstick." Her voice lightened the mood as Robbie looked at her with admiration in his eyes. A light blush on his face.

"What's been up with you lately? Is your grandmother sick? Is there anything we can do?" Beck asked his best friend as the black boy shook his head.

"No she's good." He ate his shrimp tempura realizing that his choice was the one Jade always got.

"Then why the distance man?" Robbie asked as Cat snuck a piece of raw salmon from his plate. "Are you mad at me because of that comment Woody said about your big toe?" he asked as Andre laughed at his friend's nativity.

"No that's not it."

"Well what ever it is. I hope it gets better." Beck said as Tori slurped her drink in emphasis. She did her best to not give anything away with her facial expression.

…..

Pouring rubbing alcohol over her wound. She wrapped it with gauze. Waiting on her grandmother to come back from Bingo. The woman did deserve to have some fun. Smirking at the thought of her, she opened the freezer.

Pulling out porkchops, she unwrapped them. Letting them unthaw. She would surprise her granny with a good meal. Give her a break. Show her some appreciation. If only she would show this side to her friends. They would think the world was ending.

What would they say if they found out she cut herself? Forgetting her incident, she seasoned the meat as she turned on the stove and greased the pan.

Walking to the answer machine, she pressed the play button.

"_2 messages…."the automated voice said._

"_Jade you aren't answering your phone. I was making sure you got home ok. Just call me."_

"Vega, get a life." She rolled her eyes as she erased the message.

"_1 new message…..mom you cant keep Jade away from me forever. I am her mother….i know in the past I have messed up….but I am trying to make things right_." Her mother's voice made her tremble.

Erasing the message, she continued to cook her meal ignoring what she just heard. This couldn't be happening to her. Not again.

….

She knew she could meddlesome. But she couldn't help it. All she wanted was for Jade to get help. As the gang headed to the parking lot, she pulled Andre behind.

"I know you are mad at her but she does have good reason to be defensive and…scared." The meddlesome girl said as Andre shook his head.

"I don't want to hear…." He began.

"No….it's really serious…she cuts…" The statement lingered in the air.

"Are you sure?" Andre stopped walking, looking at her again as Tori nodded. "I saw the blood from her arm. She gave this bogus story but I know she is lying."

Seeing Jade do that to herself in his mind. It hurt his heart. And the pit of stomach grew deeper. His instincts took over. And he was compelled to help her. No matter what she said. She was more important than his crush on her. Correction. His love for her.

Beck couldn't be the only thing that caused her to cut. Forgetting to say goodbye, he hopped in his car.

Turning his ignition on, he drove leaving his wolf pack behind. He had dropped Jade off a couple of times, but had never met her family. Nor was he never invited in. He always wondered why she didn't talk about them.

"Are you going to tell me what has Andre so upset?" Beck asked Tori who only shrugged in the parking lot.

"his life right now is complicated."

….

Jade smiled placing salad, mac and cheese, and pork chop on her granny's place. The woman in her sixties smiled at her beautiful granddaughter. Times like these the girl reminded her of her daughter when she was sober. Helpful, she carried everyone else's problems on her back. Everything was going great until she met Jade's father.

Better known as sperm donor. He left when Michelle was 3 months pregnant. But Jade was a blessing to her. And she did her best to give her all the love she could.

"How was your day honey?" The woman began to ate.

"Same old, same old?" Jade said as she ate some salad.

"I can't wait for you to record another song for me. You were just like your mother….."

"Grandma…..I am nothing like Michelle." The girl cut her off. Why did she say such things knowing they would upset her.

"I know that dear. You are stronger, but we cannot change out blood lines. We also can't run away from them." The woman finished eating.

"Good night dear." Her granny kissed her on the forehead as she went to sleep. It wasn't as if Jade could jade could after that statement.

Cleaning up the kitchen. She knew she couldn't change where she came from, but she tried so hard to keep her life and grandmother's together.

…..

He knew what they said the other day. But that was in the back of his head. When did the dark princess cut? And did she do this when she was with Beck. She always wore sleeves. It would explain everything. Getting out of his car, he braced himself for anything. He would put his disdainment on the side for her.

Walking up to the brick home, his feet got heavier with every step. His hand got heavier too as he rang the doorbell.

"Who could that be?" Jade dried the dishes as she walked to the door. Opening it without looking through the peephole. Expecting it to be a saleman.

"Look we aren't buying what you are sell…."her sentence ended seeing Andre in front of her. Andre saw her arm. The gauze that covered it through her sleeve. But it didn't stop their eyes from meeting. It didn't stop her from wanting him to hold her again. Touch her again. And that was what Andre did.

Reaching for her injured arm, she hit his hand away. as he examined it with his eyes, she examined him. he was so gentle. Unlike Beck who saw what he wanted to see.

"It was just an….." she began.

"No it wasn't." Anger raged inside of him. The fact that she would do this to herself. The fact that what ever the source was causing this was still there in her life.

"you weren't there. So how would you know." She said tartly. He ignored her lie as he admired her pale alabaster skin. Soft and smooth to touch as he rubbed her cheek.

So gently that Jade closed her eyes. It was as if his touch could heal her. And that was what she wanted. But this had to stop. Her heart was racing. This was too much. The closeness of him. the light hint of axe that made her want to kiss him again.

He smiled as she let him touch her. She was so beautiful. And the way she was looking at him now.

"Am I hurting you?" he asked.

"No..." She dropped her defenses.

"Let me help you. Jade. Let me be there for you."

"You can't…..don't you get it Andre. Are you stupid or…." He only placed his finger on her lip.

"Please?" he asked as she just shook her head.

"I can't." She broke his grip running back in the house. Leaving him there.

"Why can't he just leave me alone?" she closed the door. Sliding down it. Holding herself.

Andre didn't know what he was supposed to do. Help her or leave her alone. He stopped lying to himself a long time ago. He couldn't leave her alone. Not now. Even if she didn't want his help. She needed someone. And for some reason she always let him see the softer side of her. It had to be him.


	3. Everybody Talks

Everybody Talks

Neon Trees

Chapter 3

…

Jade made sure the three new fresh cuts on her arm had stopped bleeding as she pulled her sleeve down. Her mother had left another message, but luckily she had it erased it before her grandmother woke up. This was her battle, not the old woman's.

At her locker, she saw Beck there. Why were they hovering over her? Not again. She couldn't take the lack of air.

"What?" she opened her locker as Beck continued to stare at her.

"I was just checking up on you. When you didn't show up for sushi…." Beck began.

"It's called not being hungry." She slammed her locker as she attempted to walk away. But he pulled her by her arm. Feeling the gauze there.

"Jade…..are you cutting again?" he asked as he noticed her trying to hold back the moan of pain.

"Now you notice….." she said bitterly. "You would have noticed if I were Vega." She walked off.

Yes she was still bitter about the breakup. But not because she loved him. because he kept stringing her along. Flirting with other girls. And giving sex eyes to them. Like she wasn't even there. But she knew she should have left him. A relationship involved two people. But she just wanted to be wanted. To be loved unconditionally. To have someone there. She was just like her mother. Never worthy.

Beck watched her walk away. And there was nothing he could do about it because she was right. He liked her but not enough to stay with her. Not enough to want to try again. He just found himself not wanting to put energy into them anymore.

"Sup Beck." Andre spoke as he saw him stare at his ex. How would he react if he told him about their kiss. About the other night. About how he truly feels for her. But this wasn't about him. It was about Jade.

"I know this may seem random, but do you think I only added to Jade's damage?"

"…..Beck….I'm not a counselor…" He didn't want to hurt his friend. But he also didn't want to explode at his friend.

"Just tell me Andre."

"…..yeah man….on and off relationships….then the way you act around every attractive girl. You two never really talked about anything personal." The black boy stated trying to keep his calm.

"I know. And I knew. I saw and I did nothing…." Beck shook his head. So he did know. And it made him angrier. He was one of the reasons she kept pushing him away.

"What do you mean?"

"She cuts." He stated. "And I just overlooked it. Like I didn't know why….it's because of me…..I know it is." He stated firmly.

"…Me and Tori know too." He admitted. "I want to help but I don't know how to."

…

Jade sat on the rooftop of the school. She didn't feel like going. Everytime she was around them, she felt as if she was under surveillance. Like they were on pins and needles trying to say the right thing to her. They knew. Beck had been known but he just overlooked it. Hopefully, they would do the same.

Gently touching her fresh scars, tears fell. She didn't cry. She held it all in. but now by her, there were no distractions. So all she could think about was the man. The day her world changed.

_She sat on her bed as the door creaked open._

"_you're so beautiful." The man with liquor on his breath smiled evilly at her._

"_I'm going to make you feel real good." He unbuckled his pants._

"Stop it" She screamed to the top of her lungs. Trying to get him out of her head. Trying to make it all go away. The helplessness. The shame. And when he was done. He acted as if nothing happened.

…..

Andre looked around the music room. She wasn't there. He had to get away from Beck who kept wallowing in his own sorrow of being a bad boyfriend. Shaking his head. He kept opening door handles. He did his best to convince Tori and Cat not to come with him. He didn't want them to get them to get in trouble if he got caught. Plus she wouldn't feel like she was getting pounced on if just one person found her.

Finally. Opening the door to the roof. He found her there. On the gravel pavement laying down shaking.

_Found her…._he texted them.

Walking to her frail body she was shivering. Moaning. Scissors in her hand. But no blood on them. Good. He was trying to keep himself calm but this was his Jade who was lost to him and herself.

"Jade…" He got on his knees taking the scissors from her hand.

"….no don't touch. Please…don't….stop….." she pleaded. She was asleep. Andre held her in his arms. She clutched tightly to him as she moaned. Tears wetting his shirt.

"Shh…" he coaxed her. "he can't hurt you anymore. I won't let him." he said.

"No….no…."she said gripping his shirt harder as her dream grew worse. All she could see was him making her touch him.

"Jade wake up." Andre began to panic. "Please wake up." He said as her trembles lessoned.

Her eyes opened slightly. Looking at him, how did she end up like this in his arms? But he held onto her tightly. Her head on his chest. She didn't want to let him go.

"What were you dreaming about?" he asked knowing she would answer him.

"Something that happened a long time ago. It's over now though." She abruptly got out of his arms.

"It can't be if you are dreaming like that. This person really hurt you didn't he." Andre said as it clicked in his mind. Why she didn't want anyone to touch her. Why she didn't like to get close to anyone.

"I said it was over. It's in the past. It doesn't matter." She said with her sharp tongue.

"Yes it does. I'm not like Beck, Jade. I'm not going to just overlook something and pretend it doesn't exist when it does." He said with determination.

"Well I wish you would. You and Vega are the most annoying people I have ever met."

"Jade you need help. We are trying to help you. We care about you. We do. Rape is serious." Andre put his hands on her shoulders.

"What you are saying…are just lies. I'm my mother's daughter. So I can't be loved." Jade stated. "I tried to help her but she didn't want it….even after….I told her….now she's trying to come back….for me. I can't do this Andre. I'm not strong enough I'm not." Jade cried as Andre held her.

….

Tori couldn't give him sympathy. He made contributed to the situation himself. But she would not keep rubbing it in his face like others would. Hopefully, he would learn from this.

"Beck the only thing we can do is focus on Jade getting better. Have you met her family?" Tori asked.

"No…" he said with shame seeing the sad face of Cat and Tori.

"I know. I was an ass." Beck said aloud waiting in the hallway for Andre and Jade.

"Yeah you were." Robbie stated.

"An uber ass." Cat's voice rang through their ears.

Beck saw the two walk down the hallway together. The way his arm was around Jade. He was protective of her. She looked content….grateful. Better with his best friend and not himself.

"Let's go to my house. My parents are at work." Tori volunteered as the others shook their head.

"No. I will just go home." Jade tried her best to brush them off.

"Jade no…that's not what friends do." Cat said assertively as the gang looked at her in shock.

…...

Jade watched them as they gathered in Tori's bathroom. The boys gone to get them something to eat. She did need food. She didn't eat breakfast and she didn't eat too much of her supper last night. She felt too drained to eat. So drained that she ignored the empty feeling of her stomach.

Sitting on the toilet top, she watched the red head and brunette search for anything to clean infection. She found herself covering her scars with her hand. The lights were so bright. Squinting was her only solution. Biting her lip. She wasn't use to having friends as good as them. Who dropped what they were doing to help her.

And she blamed herself for this.

"here let me…." Cat got some cotton balls and alcohol trying to clean her friend's cuts. Usually her ditzy nature would lighten the mood, but she knew nothing could make this girl come alive. She was paler than normal, but somehow still had energy to refuse her help.

"I got it." Jade said with bite as she sat on Tori's toilet. Grabbing the cottonball from Cat's hand, she saw how she hurt the girl's feelings. Good. Maybe she would go away. Maybe they would all go away.

Tori just watched the girl speak with bitterness to the gorgeous red head.

She was trying to be understanding of the girl's predicament but it was hard when she was trying to hurt the ones who cared for her the most.

Like she didn't know what they thought of her. She was psychologically unbalanced. Cutting. Finding the pain a relief. A rush. The liquid pouring on her skin comforting her. Making her forget her mother. Her abuse.

"I don't even know why you guys brought me here. I don't need you or this…or Andre….." she said as Tori hit her hand against the counter.

"shut up jade." Jade obeyed looking at the furious girl.

"You are the most ungrateful person I know. You are angry at us for wanting to help you. You have friends but you don't want to let us in. you have a guy who loves you and yes Andre loves you…but you constantly push us away. Why?"

"Because…" Jade yelled crying. "If my mom doesn't love me. If my dad left me. Then why would anyone else love and care for me. Beck used me because he didn't want to be lonely. And then….that…scum…..he hurt me…..so bad…..so bad." She dropped to her knees as Cat held her….you guys weren't supposed to find this out about me….Andre wasn't supposed to kiss me….I wasn't supposed to fall for him…."she let it slip out.

"Jade you are human." Tori stated surprised at the sudden emotion from her friend.

"and every day I am constantly hit in the face and being reminded of my failures. The only person who has faith in me is my grandmother….she took me in without question."

"So you cut?" Tori stated as Cat continued to hold her friend.

"at least it's the pain I know I created…..at least."

"Jade you have to stop hurting yourself…." Cat said softly. "please."

"It's not that simple Cat." She let her defense down.

"Yes it is. You have to let us in. what about your…"

"My granny can't find out about this. She has done enough for me. She worries about me constantly. Scared I will change into my mom…..and I have….." Jade stated.

"No you haven't. You haven't run away yet." Tori touched her shoulder.

"Tori….Jade….Cat…..we're back." Beck yelled in the house.

"Coming." Tori yelled helping Jade on her feet as they walked to the living room. They noticed how Andre and Jade did their best to not stare at one another.

"6 burgers and fries….." Andre said. He was at ends with her.

"Can't forget about the apple pies." Robbie tried to lighten the mood.

"Yay! I love apple pies." Cat walked up to them as Jade sat on the couch she didn't have energy to energy.

"Andre….give it to her." Beck said knowing it wasn't his place anymore. Pouring some soda in a cup for all of them.

"I…..ok….." he stated feeling that he was probably doing more damage to her than he intended and himself. He fell for a girl he couldn't have. What she revealed to him earlier. She wasn't ready for emotions so intense….but it still made him want her….no matter what.

"Here." He said as she looked up at him as she nodded. Taking the drink and burger. Opening the burger, she ate. She didn't realize how hungry she was.

Andre noticed too. Tori moved so he could sit beside her.

"Thank you for this morning." Jade swallowed the piece of burger in her mouth.

"No problem." He stated hearing her phone vibrate. Looking at her screen, she hit the ignore button. Finishing her food, she began to look down at the ground. She knew they had a million questions for her, but she didn't feel like answering them. But she knew that they understood because they did not press her.

"Why don't we go to the beach?" Tori asked smiling at Jade who only nodded. They were trying to get her mind off of things obviously, but…wait…she would stop being cynical….and relish in the fact that since she had been around them she didn't feel the need to cut.

…..

Jade sat on the beach sand. Watching Robbie give Cat a piggyback ride. Beck and Tori walking. How were they able to go on with their lives. She wished she was them. But for now, she was enjoying the wind blowing in her hair. And the beautiful sun cascade the ocean.

Opening her eyes, her heart beat fast as he made his way to her. Sitting beside her, admiring her features in the sun's glow. But he did not ask any questions. She was already mentally exhausted but he had a feeling being here was doing her well. He just didn't want her to be here by herself.

"Andre…..why aren't you scared of me?" Jade held herself as Andre looked on the horizon at his friends.

"…..there is no need for me to be…" he turned his head looking at her, admiring her eyebrow piercing. Trying so hard not to touch her face. His hands began to shake.

"My mother keeps calling me…." She said unexpectedly. "I just don't want to get my hopes up. She still doesn't believe what happened to me…and I don't want to relive that shame again. Everything my grandmother did will be in vein then." she blandly said she rubbed her arms.

"Does it hurt when you do it?" his eyes bore into hers. She couldn't look away.

"When im done….it does." She admitted feeling so surreal at the moment. Where were her snarky comments? Her brash tongue? They disappeared when he was her.

"Can I see them….without the gauze this time?" he asked. Both not paying attention to how the others were watching them.

"I….why would you want to do that?" she panicked as he gently calmed her down by stoking her cheek.

"I'm not here to ridicule…just let me see them." She nodded as he raised up her sleeve. Touching them gently. The red marks and old cuts. It was as if he was putting life into her again. And she liked it. So much. O so much.

Andre enjoyed touching her like this. Showing her that not all men would hurt her. Smiling to himself, he saw her close her eyes, relaxed. Taking in his touch.

"Is this ok." He asked her gently touching the marks. She only nodded.

"Andre….."She touched his hand.

"I don't want you to get to close to me." She genuinely tried to looked out for him.

"Jade…..I want to though….. I want to know you. Everything about you. Just let me." And this was what scared her the most. Not her mother. Or the touch of a stranger. But true genuity of one strong-willed, passionate young man.

"Deep down…you want me too. I know it." He said staring in her eyes.

He was looking at her to say anything. But this numbness in her heart still refused.

…..

A grandmother was supposed to take care of her children. And her children's children when needed. Opening the door to her dark child's room, she looked at her granddaughter. The little moans she made. The nightmares she couldn't keep away from. Her cursed daughter Michelle. Who cursed everyone around her. So much that Jade was affected.

Like she didn't notice why she had never brought anyone home. Or never talked to her friends. But the realization made her guilty. Guilty that she had let this happen to her. That she couldn't protect her.

Sitting on the side of her bed, she ran her frail fingers through Jade's dark hair.

"Mommy….." Jade said unconsciously…instinctively.

"No dear…it's me…." She said sadly.

"O….." She sat up hoping the woman wouldn't ask about what she dreamed about. "Well let me put you back to bed." She volunteered.

"No….you do so much for me already….I need to….."

"No granny…no!" She said adamantly. "You need to rest…..you've been so tired lately."

"It's called getting old." The old woman laughed.

"don't say things like that." She verbally attacked. She didn't want to think about that…about death….not now. "I don't want to think about….i already lost mom…" She said.

"and the fact that you have erased her voice messages means you want her to stay lost." She said as the girl rolled her eyes.

"I just didn't want…..it just seems that she…everything that she has done to me…..I'm…..I feel as if I am about break…"

"I will handle it….." Lillan said sternly. "This isn't your problem. I am the adult…." She gently kissed her granddaughter on the forehead. Calming her down. Jade was definitely untamable like her mother, but she would find a solution.


	4. Set Fire to the Rain

Set Fire to the Rain

Adele

Chapter 4

….

Jade threw her phone in her locker. Her mother again. And she couldn't take it. Suffocation. Numbness. That was why she needed to cut. She needed to. She had too. Putting her face in her locker, she cried. She cried. Tears of exhaustion.

"Jade….don't cry." Cat put her hand on her shoulder. "Maybe you can call your….."

"No…." She said wiping her eyes. "Forget it…I'm fine."

"But Jade…" The red head stated concerned for friend.

"But nothing…." She began to walk away heading to Sickowitz's class. "Are you coming or what?" She turned around looking at Cat who headed towards her. For now she would put the craving aside.

As usual, the gang sat by each other. Their observing eyes on her. Choosing in their minds mentally what to say to her. So they said nothing. Just smiled. Except Andre.

She kept letting him close then pushing him away. Swallowing the lump in her chest. She tried to pay attention to the lesson.

"Today…we are going to put ourselves in each other's shoes. Basically you will give a monologue of how the other person thinks." He said as the class frowned. "And this is improvisation…." The whole class gasped. "Andre…and let me see…..Jade."

This was truly hell right now. And it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that she had to sit infront of the whole class. With the guy who she knew could see through her. Through her beligerance and cold heart.

"You have got to be killing me…" she said aloud.

"nope not one bit." He said smiling brightly. He had to pick the one person she was most opposite with. Why couldn't it have been Cat? Or Beck for that matter.

Andre dreaded walking up to her. Sitting down beside her. Not being able to touch her. Kiss her. Yell at her. Talking at her was not the same as talking to her. And right now, his hands were shaking. And his friends' eyes were on him. expecting for him to hold on to his sanity.

Andre watched her sit down in the middle of class. Arms folded waiting….hoping this moment would rush by.

And that was how she felt. She wanted to be as far from him as possible. Those deep brown eyes that suffocated her.

"Ok remember…you must feel the essen…." The teacher began.

"Yeah yeah…we know already…" Jade said rudely.

"Then begin." The two looked at each other as Andre let out a sigh of frustration. A sigh of heartbreak.

"alright…I put this mask on for so no one can see. So I can others…and myself…that I don't want to belong or be accepted…but I do…I just don't know how. I've…" he watched as she moved uncomfortably. Refusing to look in his eyes. Did he hit a nerve. "I've….." he hesitated.

"keep going mr. harris. You are doing wonderfully." Sickowitz praised as the others nodded. Maybe this would show her that she wasn't alone in this. That she didn't have to hide.

"I;ve done this for so long that I don't know how to open up. So many have hurt me in the past….but I keep this façade…to keep them away. I don't even know the true me myself." He said keeping his eyes away from Jade.

Her world began to crumble at deliverance of his speech. Every. Single. Word. Made her heart drop. Lower. And lower.

"Bull….." Jade shouted looking at him with rage in her eyes.

"You don't know anything about how I feel." She yelled as the others watched the outburst.

"O I don't Jade. I'm not afraid of you." Andre stood up challenging her with his sarcasm. Not backing down from her.

"Go to hell...all of you." She said as she stormed out of the classroom. Rubbing her hand over her head. The fact that he said that. How did he know? He always knew. It was like he was right there inside of her head. She just kept running. Ignoring the glares from her friends as they stared. Or the yells from her teacher to come back.

Andre watched her storm off. Good. She was upset. He knew he sounded immature. But she hurt him every day. Took a little piece of his heart every time she pushed him away. And though he put himself in this situation to be hurt. He still wanted to go after her. But he couldn't keep chasing after her.

"That was really unpredictable." Sickowitz stated as the class looked unsettled. Their faces puzzled.

They didn't think the dark raven would react like that.

But none looked guiltier than Beck. Who decided to go look for her. It was the least he could do for adding on to the pressures of her life.

Her face as she watched Andre's monologue. He had never seen her look at him this way. Even when their relationship wasn't rocky.

"Jade….." he checked the rooftop knowing she where she would be. Finding her there.

"You have no obligation to me anymore, Beck." She said blandly looking at scenery of the city.

"You are still my friend." He said as she rolled her eyes. Just lies.

"how can you say that with a straight face. After what you did to me….." She said as he put his head down.

"But I can't be mad because I let you do it me." She shrugged. She had to be honest with herself because she hated being the victim.

"It still didn't mean I should have taken advantage. That's why I came after you. I thought I could at least do one good thing." He put his hands in his pocket.

"You did….you let me go." She said looking at the beautiful day. The blue sky. Green trees. And with Beck here, she wished Andre was beside her now. She tried hard not too…but how did he know.

"How did he know?" she asked aloud. Seeing his face as he described her. He was so….he made her nerves unravel. He made her shake. Beck watched her.

"Jade….."

"don't say me name like that…" he said guiltily.

"like what?"

"like you pity me, like you see me as some victim….I don't need this….."

"You're right. You don't…but you do need Andre." He stated as he saw her defenses drop.

"You are just like Vega…you know…you two deserve each other." She said.

"Jade…..you are so….ugh…..don't you get it I am trying to….." Jade began to testify.

"He doesn't need protection jade. He wants to protect you. And you are so scared that you can't see straight…"

"Because I know I'm too much for him to handle." She busted aloud. "the cutting, the nightmares….."

"You have to trust him. let him know…" beck said. It was weird. He didn't find awkwardness in helping his ex and his best friend. But he knew of their chemistry beforehand.

365 days

He was singing the song to her. The look in his eyes. The way the two hugged one another.

Hammertime

The way she played the song when he was talking to another girl.

It all made sense.

…..

"I don't know why you wasted your gas here Michelle." Lillan opened the door for her untamable daughter. The eye pierce, tattoo on her shoulder. The one shoulder shirt to show it off. the alcohol on her breath.

"Because I can." Her hand on the door as she forced herself in. "you couldn't keep dodging me for long." Michelle walked inside looking around her old home. Nothing changed. From the couches to the carpet. This place was never good enough for her.

"Well you can't keep coming in Jade's life turning it upside down. She goes to school. She finally has a little bit of peace when she sleeps." Lillian stated firmly.

"Well don't we get a grandmother of the year award." Michelle said sarcastically walking to the kitchen. Pulling a glass down from the cabinet.

"Don't worry, I am getting some juice." Her daughter said opening the refrigerator. "I don't drink as much."

"That's what scares me….as much…..you can't keep doing this…."she tried to talk sense in her sporadic child.

"Lillian you can't keep doing this to me. I have a right to see her. You can't judge when I am stable or not. You haven't seen like I have been trying."

"You're right….but what about your random hookups at night. Bringing them to your home. Do you know what one of them did to…"

"That never happened." She proclaimed. "Jade use to make up a lot of stories. She probably saw us without me knowing it." She put her glass in the sink.

"You aren't even hearing yourself. You need to leave…"

"I am not going anywhere without my daughter." She said sitting on the couch.

…

Sitting eating their lunch quietly. Everyone was aware of the elephant in the room. Even Cat couldn't bring them out their trauma. All Jade could do was eat. Rethinking, she knew she her actions were uncalled for. Seeing Andre's face made her feel worse.

He did nothing. Absolutely nothing. And she punished him. for no apparent reason. Because of her shame. And she was ready to try to get better. It was finally sinking in that they were there to help her. Biting her lip, she tried to keep the tears from falling. But they wouldn't stop.

"Excuse me….I got to go….." she grabbed her things leaving. Not giving them a chance to show their care.

Letting them in was easier said than done. pushing them back was a natural instinct now.

And….

She was tired of this routine. So she knew they were. She was tired of crying. Being unhappy. But she couldn't hide it anymore because she was.

"Andre go after her." Beck pleaded as his friend shook his head. Knowing he wanted too.

"Please Andre." Cat asked. He said nothing as he ran after her. Calling her name.

"Jade…..Jade." he called to her as she stopped. Attempting to walk off of campus.

"Andre I can't keep doing this to you. It isn't fair." She said this aloud. "This is my battle not yours and I constantly turn your world upside down." Tears streamed down her face.

"Just….just let me….come here." He held his arms out as she found herself inside of them. She felt so good…so right….in his arms.

"It's ok baby." He rubbed her head gently. She let the tears come out. Wetting his chest. "Let's get out here." He looked at her as she nodded.

…..

Laying on his bed, she couldn't sleep with his eyes on her. Watching over her protectively. It wasn't opposing…she just wasn't used to being looked at like this. Like she was so beautiful. Sitting up on his bed, he dodged his eyes from hers.

"Sorry I….I'll leave you."

"No, don't." She blandly said in her usual tone. "I don't want to be alone….so don't leave me." She said. Opening herself up. Saying what she truly needed.

"You need rest though." He said.

"I know….." She saw the look in his eye. He wanted to be near her. And she did too. Moving over, she said softly….

"Come join me." He just looked at her. Did she hear herself right? Was she choosing this moment to right now….."I just don't want to….i'm….never mind." She said feeling deterred looking at his facial expression.

"No…it's cool." He took off his shoes.

Did he hear her right? She wanted him near her? He couldn't believe her words.

Laying in bed. But he kept space between them. Scared that this moment would be ruined. The rays from the sun shining through his blinds. So beautiful. Her ebony locks. The green streaks some may found eccentric, he thought it fit her perfectly.

His eyes on her, she found herself…shy. Who was this person she was becoming. It was not her. Not her at all. She felt shivers through her body. So cold. She stayed so cold. But how could she not with the amount of blood she lost. And her eating patterns.

Turning to face her. They smiled at one another. Yes she smiled at him. folding his lips, he gently moved his hand along her arms to stop her shivering. And she allowed him too.

"Do you want me to hold you?" he asked as she nodded.

Sometimes a person needed to be held…..and she needed it more than ever now. But this…the flashbacks reentered her mind. Why did they have to show up with Andre….why was she able to push them aside for Beck….then she realized….that no one affected her like Andre did. Her heart was defending herself.

Andre saw the emotions run across her face, but he could not push her. And if she changed her mind. He would be patient.

"Im not going to hurt you." He reassured her.

"I know…..I know…." She said repeating his words in her head.

Moving over, she rested her head on his chest. As he rested his arms around her waist. He watched her close her beautiful eyes. They both needed this.


	5. Give It Up

Give it Up

Fefe Dobson

Chpapter 4

….

Stressing over Jade was giving Tori a headache. She needed some medicine. Walking into the office, she walked to the nurse's station, being aware of the woman talking to the secretary.

A woman who had similar features to someone she knew….

"My daughter goes here…..Jade West." She said blandly. Tori tried not to ease drop but her eyes bucked overhearing. Trying to not stare at the woman, she knew that was Jade's mother. The deep voice, dark aura. Dark hair. She was gorgeous without belief but was of course rough.

"What's your name ma'am." The secretary smiled at the woman. Tori noticed her friend's mother annoyed look.

"It's standard procedure. We have to make sure your name is on our list so you can check them out." The old woman stated trying to sound pleasant at the angry woman.

"Michelle West….." she folded her arms watching the woman search the list.

"I'm sorry you are not on the….."

"I knew I wasn't. This is just like Lillian to do me like this. I am Jade's mother. And screw the school's policy. I can check out my daughter when I want to. What class does she have now and where is it now?" She asked firmly.

"I'm sorry I cannot give out that information." The woman stated as Tori held herself together to keep was making a sound. Taking the Advil from the nurse, she was thankful Jade chose to skip today.

"Look….I am going to count to three….and you better…." Michelle raised her voice.

"Ma'am you can't get mad at me….I didn't make the rule." The secretary stated trying to keep her composure. Gripping her desk to keep from swinging at the sporadic woman.

"Um is there a problem." The counselor came out of his office hearing the one sided yell. Looking at the secretary's face, he tried to lesson the tension.

"Yea…..Hollywood Arts won't let mothers check out their children."

"Well…ma'am I am the counselor but our principal and vice are at the school board attending a meeting. It is our policy that we send a list out at the beginning of school for parents to list the people who are allowed to check….."

"Save the bull….." she said throwing her hand in front of the man's face.

"Well if you'd like we can involve security to escort you off the premises." He said as Tori still hid behind the corner hoping no one would notice her. She wouldn't know what to do if they asked her about Jade. And she couldn't face the woman was the source of Jade's anger.

"I have not done anything." The dark beauty challenged growing redder.

"You are disrupting the peace." He stated as she stormed off slamming the door behind her.

Holy shit. How was Tori going to tell Jade this?

….

The steady heartbeat relaxed her as she listened. Jade resting on his chest. She never thought this day would come so soon. But it was here. And the smell of axe woke her up like no other. When she was with him, she felt like she was protected from everything that weighed her down.

Smirking at his light snoring, she felt his hand on her waist, and every time she tried to move, he pulled her closer to him. He didn't want to be away from her and neither did she? She actually found herself liking the idea of her defenses dropping….

But only for him.

"You slept well?" He asked as she only nodded.

"Yeah….like the dead." Her humor kicked in as he smirked shocked she was letting him touch her. "Why did you come after me….."

"Because you needed me too." He kissed her hand as she only nodded. Wanting to kiss him…but she didn't want to be forward. And with everything going awry in her life, she felt liked she didn't deserve this little piece of happiness.

Andre watched her think. He always wondered what she thought about. He hoped it was him. looking up at her, he saw the emotion in her eyes. Gently moving his hand to touch her full lips. He wanted more.

"Come here." He gently touched her chin, bringing her lips to meet his.

Her hand resting on his chest, she was addicted. She never forgot how soft they were. Or how sweet his tongue was. Moving together. Taking all of him. him taking all of her.

Surprising both of them, he turned them over. Him on top. His arm around her waist. His hand cupping her cheek. He didn't want this to stop. All this long wait. It was worth it. Seeing the million Beck kisses and break-ups. This was worth it.

The insatiable feeling of her tongue in his mouth.

Usually Jade was used to Beck shoving his tongue in her mouth…and she obliged him. but after having a taste of this, she knew she couldn't go back. Him holding her as if she would break. Her biting his lip showing him her need for him.

Breaking apart, they both took a deep breath….

"Wow….." She said sounding unlike her.

"Yeah…." He pecked her lips seeing a genuine smile from her.

_Ring ring_

Her phone began to vibrate….

By chance she looked at the screen….it was Tori….

"Wonder what she wants?" Jade grabbed her phone off the floor. Catching her breath, she sat up as Andre watched her. Smiling at his attention, she smiled back at him.

"Vega…this better be pretty damn important." Jade said as Andre smirked touching her arm.

"Yeah….." Tori entered the bathroom. Making sure no one was there inside.

"What's wrong then." Jade said blandly hearing her tense voice.

"Your mom came to the school. She's….looking….for you." Tori stated hearing silence on the other end.

"What…how did she know where to find…..did you talk to her…."Andre noticed her begin to tense. Her voice panicked as Andre grabbed the phone.

"Tori….what's….." before he got the sentence out Tori told him the story. Looking at Jade's pale complexion, she began to shake.

"She can't be here. She can't be here…she can't…" Jade said aloud rocking herself. All Andre could do was rest her head on his shoulder.

"I won't let her hurt you." Tori heard him tell her over the phone.

"Look….I will talk to you later." He hung up the phone.

"I can't go back with her….I can't go with Michelle…."

"I know." He got up as she watched him grab his keys.

"What are you doing…?"

"I'm going to go to your house….maybe your mom is there." Andre stated.

"No…." Jade stood up facing him.

"You can't do that. She's crazier than me. This isn't your battle. " Jade pleaded.

Andre didn't know what he was up against…and honestly, he didn't know when he became so protective but this important to him. Jade was important to him. and he wasn't thinking clearly.

"Might not be….but I have to do something." He walked out the door as she followed.

….

The old woman's blood boiled as she saw her daughter drive up to the house. Seeing her daughter come closer to her house made her scream louder mentally.

"You just had to make a scene didn't you?" Lillian walked outside not letting her daughter in. Know how her daughter acted.

"well how else was I supposed to see my daughter…and don't act like my name not being on the list was a mistake."

"I'm not acting because It was deliberate. You are not going to be near her." Lillian screamed. "I would rather die than see you erupt her life in catastrophe like you did years ago…you know what that man did to her…and you chose to overlook it…then you barge into her life again."

"do you want me to tell you that you are a better mother than me…..do you want me to thank you for taking her in." Michelle said sarcastically.

"I'm not because I didn't ask you too. I didn't want you too."

"Well Jade did. That night she called me…crying…..because of what you did…leave." She said sternly walking back inside her house picking up the phone. Not knowing that her daughter was following her.

…..

Jade closed her eyes trying to mentally prepare herself for what would happen. Did her grandmother know about Michelle? Not that skipping wasn't bad enough… but how would she introduce Andre? Seeing him drive, she touched his shoulder to calm him down. He was the most compassionate person she had ever met.

He knew this wasn't his battle, but it was his right to protect her. And he would. From what Tori told him, her mother was twice the fire of Jade. So he had to be prepared for her. As he drove, he held her hand. Squeezing it tightly, he kissed it.

"Don't worry." He parked the car. Jade only nodded hearing yells inside.

Rushing up the steps, she opened the door. Seeing Michelle trying to grab the phone from her grandmother's hand. And her heart stop.

Her "biological mother's" hands on her "real mother's" shoulders. And her heart dropped seeing the pain on her grandmother's face.

"Get the hell off of her." Michelle pushed the woman on the floor without pause. Instinctively, she helped her granny.

"Are you alright?" She sat her down on the couch handing her an aspirin. Michelle's eyes glared in jealousy as her daughter obviously chose Lillian's side.

"Jade what are you doing here….you are supposed…." The grandmother began to chasten. As if this was a normal situation.

"If I hadn't come…then who knows what she would have done….hello Michelle." Jade put the phone on the hook as Andre walked inside. Both the women's eyes looked at the out of place black boy with dreds.

"this is Andre…." Jade introduced him. "He's my…"

"Friend. I drove her here…" He lied for her. Well it wasn't a complete lie. And his nerves were shot at seeing what he just walked into. The three woman…going back and forth with words.

Jade and her grandmother vs. Michelle

"I heard you were looking for me…."

"So she convinced me to take her to see you." He lied for her. He didn't want Michelle to think that her daughter was scared of her. She had no reason to be scared of her since he was around.

"I'm glad she did." Andre as he looked at the dark woman accusingly. With the same features as Jade only deadlier.

He was trying to figure when did he become so brave, but he realized, he had a reason to be.

Michelle looked at the boy as well with curious eyes. He was someone close to her daughter obviously…but he had no right.

"You have no right to give your opinion on something you don't know anything about." Michelle stated.

"I know enough…and you have no right to come here and try to take her away from her friends and family."

"Why you…" she approached him as Jade moved in between the two.

"Don't you touch him….hit me instead." Jade said as Andre pushed her behind him.

"No….." Andre turned around touching Jade's cheek as she fell in love with him. At that moment.

Michelle's eyes began to burn seeing the interaction between the two. Lillian was so tired but shewas just happy that someone was helping her fight this long on going battle.

"I'm not going to let this….black boy…..come and corrupt…."

"Are you serious….it's because he's black….would you have believed that man raped me if he was black….." Jade yelled grabbing the phone off the hook.

She thought Michelle couldn't listen to common sense. She was wrong. She saw why her grandmother reached for the phone.

Andre couldn't believe his ears. 2012 and people were still racist. He knew this…but none were ever brave enough to admit. And he pitied her. This woman couldn't even help herself so how could she help Jade…

"I'm calling the police." The raven goddess said as Andre stood over her protectively.

"I'll be back…." Michelle walked out slamming the door. Making a picture frame fall to the ground. Standing up slowly, the frail woman walked to the window seeing her daughter drive off. What did she do wrong?

Jade bent down grabbing the small pieces as one nicked her skin, staring at the little trickle of blood…Andre grabbed a paper towel placing it on her cut…pressing down.

Lillian stared at her courageous friend. Who was he?

"Jade you have a lot of explaining to do." The woman looked between the two teens sharing a moment. Never had she seen her granddaughter smile softly like that.

"My name is Andre Harris." He stood up helping Jade stand….extending his hand to the woman who gladly shook back.

"Lillian…."

"thank you….and I am sorry that you had to see this your first time over here." The woman shook her head.

"It's ok." He solemnly said.

"No it's not…..Michelle always had warped ideas…..like her father….but I can assure you that I am nothing like her….she had no right to talk to you like that…but then again…look at how she talks to me and Jade." The girl held her head down.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of…."Andre put his arm around the dark mistress.

"It's so nice to see her with a friend…"

"Granny….." Jade shook her head in embarrassment.

"It is….I am always telling her to open up to people. But she doesn't…..not even me sometimes….how did you do it….and how are you still alive." Andre chuckled as he helped the woman sit down.

"I don't know….but I am here if she needs me." He turned around looking at her.

…

This wasn't the last of her. She was going to get what she wanted. Michelle's anger floored as she drove to her hotel room. She was going to get her daughter whether they wanted it.


	6. Anything Could Happen

Anything Could Happen

Ellie Goulding

Chapter 6

…

Jade watched as he unwrapped the bandages on her arm. A look of wonder glazed her eyes at the teen that was strong enough to be weak. The teen rough enough to be tender.

Sitting on the toilet, she didn't protest as usual. She was too drained. Taking a deep breath, a hiss escaped her mouth when she felt the alcohol touch her scrapes.

But how did Andre feel? This wasn't his battle. And yet he jumped willingly to the task of being there for her. Folding her lips, she was still shamed.

She was a representation of where she came from.

The bitter, drunk, racist woman who wanted everyone to feel pain like her.

And in ways, Jade felt like Michele. She endured so much pain that she only wanted to add misery to other's lives. She was truly wicked. There was once a time where she thrived off of people's pain.

Her snarky comments. Her black wardrobe…were just a mask.

What would people do if they knew the real her? But she didn't know who the real her was anymore.

From her mother, to the man who raped her…she didn't want them to win….and yet they were.

She felt as if she had no other choice but to escape into the dark abyss of her mind…..and pain of scissors….razors.

Andre saw every emotion in the dark girl's eyes. Her sadness, pain, fear….and her curiosity of him. As he rubbed her scars with ointment, he blew on the wounds to dull the pain. And he found himself feeling so much at one time.

He wanted to protect her….love her…teach her. She didn't have to run or hide. Despite her mother's hateful actions. Or hateful words.

To love something more than your daughter. More than your flesh and blood. That was why it was an addiction.

"Go on ask…." He put a fresh bandage on her arm as he felt her eyes on him.

"Why Andre? I keep asking myself this. This isn't your responsibility and it would be selfish of me to impose my life onto you….."

"Jade…."

"I know I keep going in circles with this…but Andre….I just can't have you endure this…."

"Well that's not your choice is it?" He looked at her.

….

Cat stood at the doorway. His doorway. The boy whose shy ways she grew fund of. The boy whose nerdy mannerisms always made her smile. Looking at the floor, Rex laid there. And she wondered why?

The toy that he couldn't seem to separate himself from. The toy that somehow became his true voice.

Laying on his bed, his back was turned to the door.

Biting her lip, she touched his shoulder as he sat up quickly.

"I'm sorry. Your mom let me in." Her voice rang in his ears as he was forced to look at her beautiful face.

"what brings you here?" his shyness took over. It always did. This would be so easy if he had Rex beside him.

He hated himself for being so scared and nerdy. He hid behind a toy to mask himself from the world.

"I was….worried about Jade….I guess I didn't want to be alone…Tori wasn't answering her phone. Neither was Beck…and I figured Jade and Andre were together….I just….." She bit her lip.

Why was she always so wordy….and ditzy?

"So I am a constellation prize?" His shoulders lowered.

"No….no….Robbie….that's not at all what I am trying to say….i just feel that I bother you so much as it is." She held herself as they sat on the bed.

This boy always made her think. He always was able to pull a serious conversation out of her. And he always sparked her interest.

"Says the gorgeous talented girl who talks to the nerd with his puppet." He laid on his bed as his sarcasm hurt her.

"Stop it…." She laid beside him.

"You're right….this isn't about me….it's about Jade…and how we were never to see her breakdown until now…does that make us bad friends to her?" He began to analyze himself.

"No….no…..Robbie….we can only see what others allow us to see. Jade kept us away with her…..morbidness…but luckily Andre saw it."

Cat saw the display of emotions on his face. This was deeper than Jade. This was within himself.

"Yeah…sometimes I just…..I just….never mind." He looked at the ceiling feeling Cat's eyes on him.

"No…tell me…." She blushed when she grabbed his hand…lacing their fingers as he blushed too.

"I just wished I had more people skills. I just wish I could see things more clearly. I just wish I was different…maybe ….maybe I wouldn't be so awkward….maybe people wouldn't feel the need to avoid me…..maybe then I could accept myself…" He saw Cat's sadness.

"Sorry…I'm being selfish again. Jade needs us and I'm moping about not being cool."

"There is nothing to apologize about." She squeezed his hand. "You need attention just like everyone else….." they looked at each other as they both laid on the bed.

"I wish you could see yourself like I see you…..smart….kind….I find myself wanting to be around you all the time…" She folded her lips looking at his.

"Me too….when I am around you…I am happy." He gently tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "I don't think about my nerdiness….or my clumsiness….i don't even want to be around Rex….i just want….to be around…..you." the two smiled as they gripped each other's hand tighter.

….

"I just hate how no matter how hard I try…I can't hate you….." she lightly said as he guided her out the bathroom.

"That's a good thing though…." He let her guide him to the couch.

"I just can't help but still be shaken up." She rested her hands on her head.

"My mom is still trying to find ways to get me back….it will be a cold day in hell." She admitted. "Lilly is getting older and more feeble." She looked at the strong male beside her.

"Let's not think about that…..as of now…..let's just focus on you getting sleep."

"Why can't I be like you Andre?" she allowed him to hold her.

"And how is that?"

"Strong…..right now I wish I had to power to just make things better for myself and my grandmother….i wished I could make Michele go away….."

"Jade you are stronger than you think…..to go through that physical and emotional abuse and look her in the face…." He rubbed her back.

"But this isn't over…..its far from over….I know her…"

"Let's not think about that….right now….lets just get some rest…let's just take one step at a time.

…

Robbie looked into her chocolate eyes. She was so close…and he wanted to be even closer to her. ….but there was no way he would have a chance…..he wish he had the swag of Andre and the calmness of Beck.

Their two different personalities worked in their favor.

"Cat I want to…." He began. He didn't get the chance to finish….because her lips were on his.

The red head didn't mean to be forceful, but her dream was so close in her arms. She couldn't resist. And it was just like her dreams.

Their lips moved together….getting to know one another. Cupping her face, he deepened their kiss.

Asking for entry with his tongue as Cat gave it to him. Removing his glasses without breaking the kiss.

Moving on top of him, she felt his hands wrap around her waist.

Was this happening to him? Was the most beautiful in his eyes taking interest in him?

The way their lips moved together told him yes….

He would lock the fear away. And go with his heart.

….

Michele slammed the door of her apartment as she sat her keys down.

"That damn Lillian…" She said with fury.

Memories flashing of her daughter and mother. Years later the woman still thought she could control her life.

"_Mom…where are my keys?" The gorgeous woman looked the older woman in the eyes as she wiped her mouth._

"_Hidden." Lillian smelled the liquor on her breath. No way she was going to let the mother of her granddaughter drink and drive._

_She thought moving them in with them would do Michelle some good. But this was bigger than all of them together._

"_I am not some child." Her voice rose as she began to search the house. "I need to get out here…." _

"_Well I hope you leave Jade behind." Lilly watched as the woman frantically looked on tables and cobinets._

"_Don't worry…I am just going to a bar….. we will be out of here by the end of next month." Michelle searched under the couch cushions. _

_Nothing…damn it._

"_You can't do that to that little girl….give her some stability…" Lillian walked slowly to kitchen…hoping her daughter wouldn't find them._

_Yet making sure she was out of her way. She didn't want to fight._

"_I want her with me rather than you. A woman who thinks she knows the answer to everything." Michelle searched the trashcan._

"_That's the alcohol talking…." Lilly knew it was pointless._

"_No mom….it's me…you couldn't control dad….you can't make up for it through me and Jade." Michelle thought of the man who left them. Why didn't he think enough of her to bring him with her? _

"'_Chelle you have to let that go…" Lilly said not seeing Jade hide behind the corner. The little girl hold the teddy bear. Afraid._

"_I have….now tell me where the damn keys are….." The woman demanded._

"_Mommy…granny….are you two arguing again." The little girl walked towards her mother._

"_Jade…..don't worry….." The mother smiled. "your granny is just trying to keep something away from me that I need….." Michelle lowered her voice for her daughter. Her beautiful daughter._

"_is it the bad drink?" Jade's innocence caused the grandmother to cry. No matter how you tried to hide things away from children, they k new._

"_No…no..baby." Michelle lied._

"_Then why are trying to leave the house?" Jade looked at her mother._

"_I just…..let me take you to bed." She picked the daughter up as Lillian let out a sigh of relief. _

_She didn't find them. The kitchen cabinet was her new hiding place. For now._

"_You won this one." Michele came back into the kitchen 15 minutes later._

"_There is nothing to win. This is not a battle. This is you needing to get help."_

"_I don't need help….like I said….we are leaving in two months….." The woman left for her room._

Lillian the self righteous woman. The woman who was always at odds with her. The woman who always thought she knew best.

The woman who thought she was an unfit mother.

Once again, Lilly turned her daughter against her. And she hated that look of hate Jade had for her….

Right now she could go for a cold beer. Feeling the poison go down her throat, she let out a sigh of breath.

The things it took away from her….and yet…she wanted more of it.

So much anger she had in her heart. That she knew would never go away.

The anger of losing her daughter…..

The anger of that…black boy with her…..the way he touched her….looked at her….

She would not allow it…..

She had listened to Jade's lies…..

She would not take anymore of this…..

Grabbing the phone, she began to dial….

…..

Lillian couldn't sleep, looking at her scrapbook. The pictures of Michele growing up. Who knew Bob's leaving would hurt her this much? The unresolved feelings her daughter exhibited now followed her into adulthood.

It affected Jade. And there was nothing she could do about it now.

Even then when she tried to talk about it.

Michelle would just avoid it.

This plight was her doing. And she couldn't forgive herself.

As her wrinkled hands turned each page, tears wet the many photos.

Church services, choir practices, school awards….

But she would not let Michele take Jade. She would save her if it was the last thing she would do.

She just didn't know how.

Interventions didn't work…..

Counseling didn't work…..

There just had to be something.

….

Tori kept hitting the ignore button on her phone. She didn't want to hear from Beck again.

Beck.. the boy whose stoic demeanor got under her skin. The boy who she found herself catching feelings for.

The boy that she did her best to stay away from.

Deep down she knew she and him were both the cause of adding to Jade's problems.

And she did her best to keep her feelings under control….but it was so hard to do….

At the beach, it took everything for her not to hold his hand. And he knew it.

And listening to him feel guilty only made her feel guilty.

_Ring, Ring_

This boy was relentless.

"Beck….go…" She didn't finish her sentence seeing Andre stand there.

Opening the door, she let him inside.

"I take it I'm not the guy you wanted to see….." He sat on the couch resting his hands on his head. It took everything in him to calm Jade down.

"…..just tell me how Jade is." She adjusted her glasses as she listened to his story.

"wow….." The was the only word she could produce. Imagining the three women yelling and screaming at each other. Imagining how Michelle could be so forceful.

"I know…..and Jade is so scared her mother is plotting against them in everyway. And I don't how I am supposed to make that fear go away….." He sat back.

"Andre…you can't make it go away. What you can do is help her get through it. Let her know that there is someone there by her side. You're not superman." Tori assured.

"I know…it's just that both of my parents died when I was little. I don't even remember them. That's why I spend so much time taking care of my grandmother. She's the only one I have left…..besides you guys" He looked at Tori.

"I know how Jade feels when it comes to that." Tori rested her head on his shoulder. She knew he didn't like to talk about his parents too much. But he always pulled through and made the most of every situation.

"So how is your grandma?" The young girl asked.

"Good….ever sense the doctor put her on a new medication." He got up looking at his watch. "No more hallucinations…yet I kind of miss her insanity…." He snickered.

"Are you serious?" Tori teased as the two laughed as he headed for the door.

"Andre…I know you are taking care of Jade…but take care of yourself too….." He only nodded shutting the door.

Looking at the phone, she put it on her charger. Usually it seemed as if she was the center for all of them. She was the glue that kept them together, but even she had a hard time determining between right and wrong.

Looking at the picture of her and Beck together, she shook her head at what was never to come.


End file.
